What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
