I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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