I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Randomize
