I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
