So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize
