This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
They have beer where we have blood.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
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