shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize
