i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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