Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Randomize
