I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize