sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Randomize
