Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
i drank out of a bidet.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Randomize
