I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
