i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
