i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Mom said you looked used
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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