She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Randomize
