I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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