Duck Duck Cougar?
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
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