Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
