He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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