Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Randomize
