Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Randomize
