he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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