well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
Drake has all the answers
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Randomize
