i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize