What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
