Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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