I wannas sexs uuuuu
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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