I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
me + whiskey = a bad person
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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