I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
