If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
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