She's 40ish and I couldn't wake her up with a stick of dynamite. My sheets are going to be covered in glitter lotion and smell like grape vodka and shattered dreams tomorrow.
Aren't divorce parties fun?
You and I have very different definitions of fun.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Randomize
