Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Someone came in the potted fern
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
