I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Randomize
