i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
