thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Randomize
