I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
