Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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