I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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