Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(269): View more from Michigan

3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall

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(440): View more from Ohio

Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.

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(303): View more from Colorado

We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it

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(304): View more from West Virginia

alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2

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(651): View more from Minnesota

i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.

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(815): View more from Illinois

So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.

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(706): View more from Georgia

We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!

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