I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Randomize
