Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
