chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Randomize
