Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
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