It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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