I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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