Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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