You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
