there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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