that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I just found puke in my bra..
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Randomize
