Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
